OH MY DEAR GRACIOUS GOODNESS!! Tonight was something else! Let me tell you.. Okay so early in the day I'm chatting it up on facebook with my friend Molly. I like to call her Smolls. Anywho, Smolls asks me if I was going to this workshop tonight at 7pm to learn the history and style of House dancing. So I was like, you know what sure, I'll go, I don't really have nothing planned for tonight and Smolls is really fun to hang out with, not to mention that House dancing is really fun and free-feelling as well and I like it. Then she continues to inform me that it cost 5 dollars to get in. Now one thing to know about me is that I am a broke college student! And the main reason for this is that once I get a hold of some cash I will spend it faster than cockroaches will hide when you turn on a light switch. (aint lyin) So I let Smolls know that there is a possiblilty that I actually might not be able to go because I won't have enough money. Then, she started to hardcore convince me into going by saying, "No! Isaiah, you HAVE to go!! It'll be so much fun and such a great experience for you to learn the culture of different dance genres...." and I remember thinking to myself, I wonder why she wants me to go so bad because I know shes speaking the truth but it definitely sounds like there's a catch or something. So I was just thinking, I'll let her think she's fooling me but, I know she's leaving some info out, I'll just wait a few seconds until she stops beating around the bush... Then, right before we hang up she says really quickly, "Oh, and Alejandro is going to ride with us..." At first I'm just like, Alejandro?? Who the eff is that?! ...Then, vague images of a tall-lanky-chicken-leg looking boy strutting the hallways of UVU like he just came from a runway lesson by Tyra Banks appeared into my head. And I'm like, Awe HAY No! So I calmly ask Smolls just to make sure I'm getting things straight. So Smolls...(sarcastic giggle) is this the really awkward gay guy that comes to hip hop doing vogue every thursday night? ..knowing full well you can't be voging to the song fireman by lil wayne. Then she replied, yeeeaah...., it'll definitely be an interesting ride to Salt Lake for sure.. but I'm sure it will be worth it. See now, she knows she's a lie and a quarter... Yea, she might have wanted me to go, but it wasn't only because she knew I would have a good experience.. the main reason she wanted me to go was because she didn't want to have to drive a whole 50 miles with a mini Andy Dick in her car, touching all over her radio. She KNOW she wrong. haha. But you know what it's okay, I'm very dedicated to making my life be as fun as possible so I just told myself, its fine, 5 dollars aint nothin.. I'll just donate plasma bodda bing bodda bang, aint no big deal. Well, I failed to realize that in order to donate plasma I need to eat something. So I get all the way down to the plasma donation office, wait about 45 minutes to get my finger pricked with a needle right in my vain (ooh! I swear they aim right for the vain just to see you squeal) then! I was sent home because I didnt eat enough to donate. I was thinking Oh hale No they just didnt! Man, now I have to go home and steal some food from one of my roomies because I'm not about to waste some of my food on something stupid, just to get a few bucks for donating plasma. uh, no mam miss pam... Oh heck no I'm sure not...... Sorry ...... See, and I dont even feel like stealing their food is a crime because it's not like I WANT to, I HAVE to, in order to survive. ....Anywho, I ride the bus all the way home to find my roommate Anthony sitting on the couch looking all exhausted like he just ran a marathon, knowing full well he didn't. So I asked him, Anthony, why you flooding up my house with all that sweat? You trying to reenact Noah's arc or what? ..cuz if that's the case, you need to take all. that.. outside.. He begin to tell me about an incident that happened last night when I was gone at a friends house. Supposedly Anthony has some history with this girl who I told him to stay away from because she aint nothing but trouble. Plus, she did him wrong on his birthday which is an automatic FUGLY in my book, old Emily Rose looking tramp. (Lets call her grenade, because trust me, her faceand her body is like a ticking bomb about to explode at any moment.) So anyways, grenade had the audacity to come over to MY house last night with 3 other friends MO-HO, LARE-HO, and CURL-HO (*moho is a girl) So, they all come over looking for Anthony. So Anthony comes out to the living room to see what they want......Tell me why from the moment they walked in the house til the moment they left..... FEVER, and they weren't just giving him just any type of fever.. they were giving him, scarlet's fever! and im like umm-no-mam... First off, THEY ARE SO LUCKY THAT I WASNT HOME. Second, why in the heck are you coming over to my house at 12am in the morning on a Thursday night?? And most importantly! ..Why are you coming for my roommate Anthony...... when nobody has sent for thee.. Okaay... If you didn't get a letter in the mail saying, meet me at my house at 12am, Thursday night,,, then I shouldn't be hearing a knock on the door, finding you standing on my porch with a slap-happy expression on your face like if you just arrived at a party... because I'm sorry to burst your bubble sweetie, you came to the wrong address. The party is a few blocks down, make a right, then a left, and keep driving a couple hundred miles until you are in the next city, mmk...... b/c i mean, furreal?! ...Anyways, Anthony comes out and already he knows theres gonna be some drama. He asks them, What'd I do now? Grenade looks at him and says, lets go talk somewhere in private. So they both go to one of the spare rooms in the back of the house that we dont use. They start talking and all of a sudden Moho, storms in the room and starts cursing up a storm, yelling at Anthony. "If I ever catch you talking to her again (pointing at grenade), I'm going to call the mother effing cops on you Beeah." .......Okay, ummm... SCUH-USE ME?.... Is moho out of her freakin mind?? Did she just get out of an insane asylum?? ...Did she get beat by Chris Brown forgetting her name like Miss Rheee-anna did?? Clearly.... I think she did... Because how in the fetch did she end up from point A, standing in the living room looking dazed and confused about a party invite that has obviously given you the wrong address.. to... point D, yelling and cursing at my roommate for which she really has no business doing anyways! I missed a few letters apparantly because Homegirl must have gotten lost or something. Who gave her permission to march around our house like she owns the place, giving people all types of fever. See! thats why I say they're lucky that I wasn't there because they don't know.... I would have given them the freakin Swine flu... for which there is no cure. Shoot! I slap ghetto black girls in Tx for a living and make them scream like white girls. Don't play with me... cuz winning aint nothing new for this beauty people call, Isaiah. "All I do is win win win no matter what!" -T pain on that booty. Naw I'm sayin.. Any ways after Anthony had had enough of getting yelled at, he walks back into the living room and hears Lare-ho and Curl-ho saying, "oh we're just here just in case you try and do something to the girls.." ...kay, CUT CUT... who are you talking to? so what, you think I'm suppose to be scared? ..are you freckin kidding me? You both look like oompa loompas straight out of an episode of the Jersey Shore. What I got to be scared of.. Shoot, give, me a reason. Please!. because I haven't been scared of somebody in a loooong time. Don't make me have a BF! (lol) Anywho they all ended up leaving.... but, ooh, i swear!.. TRAILER TRASH these days... OH!! And! the worst part about this whole incident is that the whole time that Anthony is getting accused and abused, my other roommate David is in his room right next door knowing full well he can hear everything that is going on and doesn't even once think to come out of his room and stick up for Anthony. I seriously don't see how he just sat in his room doing God knows what, probably cyber chatting with a random girl, who I don't doubt is actually a 50 year old man wearing lip stick.. aint lyin! ooh, i swear.. COWARDS these days...
TO BE CONTINUED......
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